Top Tips for Patients

Having recently had shoulder surgery, some advice:

• Memorizing your patient number will amuse the nurses
• Conversely, making your first statement after coming out of general anesthesia, “It was supposed to be the other arm” will not amuse them
• Like the man said, you can’t buy IV saline bags, you can only rent them
• If the light opiate I took for a day and a half was any indication, the constipation would make heroin addiction a no-go for me